With Covid Comes Grief
Fri May 07 2021
Covid never directly took our loved one ,our only son, but it did make losing him worse!
We were in lock down and were in care of his daughter at the time of his death and had not seen him in a couple months due to lock down restrictions! We had made a decision to allow him back into our home on fathers day with restrictions in place the pain of him not seeing us or his daughter was getting unbearable the benefits of him seeing us and his 7 yr old daughter outweighed the risks of an outdoor gathering in june.! It was never to happen as that night of june 18th we were informed our son had tragically died in an accident! To tell a 7 year old her father her hero has died you cant imagine but to plan a funeral to grieve during covid 19 even more unimagineable!
During these times of utmost pain and grief we have known nothing more than to gather surround yourself with loved ones fill your emptiness with love and acknowledge the life lost the person the hole left by the loss of this person and during covid most could not! we couldnt accept hugs or visitors. how do you grieve over zoom? how do you hug in a text? the one thing I wanted most was to honour my son with a funeral a memorial hug someone cry on someones shoulder and none of this was legal! then came the reality we had to find a way to help our only grandchild make it through it! she could not play with any other kids she was alone not only from the loss of her father and having no mother in her life but no siblings and no school no friends she could socialize with! it wasnt safe it wasnt legal! We were finally able to send her to an after school program for kids her age and it was true heaven for her! but then covid grew and they closed it again and schools we were back to no one 2 seniors and a 7 yr old! We did the best we could and still are but this group club was small all outdoor activities under full covid requirements no indoor activities at all regardless of weather and it was taken away! It was safer than the indoor school they all wore masks outside climbing trees learning about nature a few hours a day to totally be kids! it was all gone again! Grief counselling well that was something to be desired living in rural ontario with limited access to affordable internet! $200 a month for sattelite internet 150 gb a month thats something to be desired! if the one thing someone could have given me to get through this whole ordeal easier it would have been high speed internet access that was reliable and affordable! I could have home schooled my grandaughter gave her access to online friends on zoom online counselling for grief but to our ususal dismay it is not to be! we pay $200 a month for limited unreliable access and because of the cost may find ourselves as the year goes on without even that becasue of the cost! Again we are left alone to survive no companionship no counselling no help .