I wake up filled with dread and anxiety
Mon Apr 26 2021
I wake up every morning exhausted and filled with anxiety. My husband and I are fortunate enough to work from home, but doing so means that our 3 year old toddler must attend daycare. I worry every morning that we will all catch covid because none of the child care providers at his centre have been vaccinated yet. I spend the work day answering emails and attending meetings at a tiny work station that we shoved into our 1-bedroom beside our bed. My husband works in the living room and we have to be in separate rooms because we are always in meetings. I haven’t seen my coworkers or even close friends in person in over a year now. We take our toddler to the playground on weekends, but we’ve had to teach him to not get close to other kids or their parents, especially when they do not wear masks. I worry that this will have long term affect on him. It does on us, because I’ve started to have panic attacks when I go to the grocery store and there are too many people in the aisles. I’ve forgotten what it’s like to look forward to things because every day is the same - work, daycare pickup, come home, sleep, repeat. We used to visit family across Canada but now I wonder if we will ever be able to do that again. We are considered a “hot spot” area for vaccines, but I feel like the government did that just to get our hopes up.